A Ride Thru in Montana
Before moving to Montana with “Reckless Abandon”, I had notions as to what life was like in this great state.
- I wondered if I would have to order my stuff online and if I would have to use Netflix because there was no cable.
- I pondered stocking up on food, in case the grocery store was not in walking distance and I got snowed in.
- I pictured cowboys and cowgirls everywhere, and what kind of cowboy hat and boots would look good on me.
- I wondered – would I be able to stop my truck on icy streets without rear-ending the car ahead of me?
- Would all of that winter clothing be a pain in the butt to put on and off, all winter long?
- Would I have to eat like a Yankee because I was moving up north?
- Did the radio stations play nothing but country?
Then there was the morbid part. Should I buy my little ones a St. Bernard in case they got lost in the snow? I had heard horror stories that had creeped me out and I certainly didn’t want my kiddos to freeze to death because they got lost on the way to the mailbox.
All of these worries have been unfounded.
But there is a lot of truth in bmiller’s funny video, “So You Want to Move to Montana”.
The video pokes fun at what it’s like to live here. A man and a woman have a discussion in the lunch room. A man tells a woman he is moving to Montana where he will open the first Starbucks in the state. After a yee haw, the woman explains why it is a bad idea to move to Montana…he must have a horse to live in Montana, there is no electricity, and no paved roads.
He will have to use an outhouse, get chewed by bears, and possibly get eaten by abominable snowmen.
She tells him it would be hard to sell coffee and tea to people in Montana and finally convinces him that Montanans are too busy to buy coffee because if they are not:
Churning butter, plowing a field, going hunting, going fishing, making a bear skin rug, chopping wood, building a fire, building a barn, marrying a cousin, shoveling snow, shoveling manure, milking a cow, milking a goat, milking a kitty cat, restringing a banjo, making moonshine, digging for gold, killing drifters, putting junk under a porch, wrestling a dog, cooking Pioneer Woman recipes, throwing rocks at beavers, buying ammunition, riding a horse, baking bread, renting movies from 1987, forming anti-government militias, sending smoke signals, eating venison, going poop in the out-house or avoiding the abominable snowman, they are drinking whiskey by the gallon in a saloon.
The only one I really don’t get is renting movies from 1987. What is that all about? Does it have something to do with getting our videos from the grocery store? Oh, never mind.
As it turns out, we do have access to the internet and I can share this video with you.
Marlene
